Hey peeps! Our topic this week came from a young lady from North Carolina, believe it or not! Her message was this:
"So, I made it through high school and college with a solid group of friends. But now I'm in grown-up land and I'm working all the time and I feel like the only interaction I have is with my co-workers and my dog. It's so much harder to make good friends once you're out of school! Any suggestions? I want more people to hang out with".
Well this is something I'm sure a lot of us feel- unless you're one of the lucky few who kept in touch with the same people ever since kindergarten. (that's not me). I've got a few close friends from college that I still keep in touch with and one or two friends from high school that I see once in a blue moon. You're very right. It's hard! Especially because right after college, everyone splits into their next adventure, and some of us get married, some of us pursue a crazy career, and some of us have kids- which means all of a sudden you're in no-man's land trying to find a niche.
These are the tips I have however-
1. Reach back out to people you might not have been that close with before.
Sometimes the best friends are the ones that you never expected to connect with. A lot more people than you know are most likely feeling the same disconnected feeling as a "grown-up".
2. Start more random conversations when you're out and about.
I know this one's tricky for those introverts, but some really really cool relationships can build from random interactions at your favorite coffee shop or the gym. Challenge yourself to find something random to comment on or compliment someone on while you're out for the day! You might be surprised where the conversation goes!
3. Don't worry so much.
Sometimes it's actually a really good thing to have some quiet, quality time alone (or with your dog!) Learn to appreciate those quiet times and make the most of them. If you can be at ease with the times that you're alone, and also take the time to invest in the few important relationships you have, you can't go wrong.
I'm not spitting out random bits of advice for no reason, people. I have seen all three of these things work in my life, and I have felt every bit of frustration that our friend from NC has expressed. Hang in there! We're all figuring out this adulting thing together xoxo
I always love to hear from you with whatever you're going through! Please send your mid-week manual blog requests to firstname.lastname@example.org!